The Music a World-Class DJ Uses to Fall Asleep

Happy SMART Day Everyone!

I like choices.  Nearly every one of my decisions is carefully researched to maximize the greatest number of benefits.  When I buy something, I like to know I purchased the best product at the best price.  When I travel somewhere, I am fairly certain I’ll enjoy the most outstanding experience available.  When working I am reasonably convinced that I have covered as many bases as possible and creatively contributed to my field.   And while most of the time I enjoy the process—I have to admit there are times when I take the whole thing to extreme. (I’m sure Thom, my husband, would agree!)  That’s when I know I am caught in the loop of over-thinking and that’s when it’s time to seek recovery.

Here are five clues that your over-thinking has become addictive:

#1 You worry too much.  Even if we say we are just considering all the options, if you can’t stop thinking about a certain situation and the experience carries a heavy and depressing feel to it—then our over-thinking is just disguised worry.  In fact, worry disguised as over-thinking is often called rumination.

#2 Interrupted sleep. If we routinely wake up in the middle of the night and can’t stop considering all our options, decisions and circumstances, then once again our mind is stuck on overdrive.

#3 We suffer from analysis paralysis.  Whenever we are stuck and unable to move forward it is likely from fear generated by over-thinking.  Just about every form of writer or creative block falls in this category.   Plus, this form of paralysis commonly hides a fear of not being good enough or potential loss.

#4 Over-thinking shares some similarities with OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder).   According to Dr. Norman Doidge, “Many people with OCD have obsessive doubts and are always second-guessing themselves. “  Second-guessing, doubts, fears, and worry all go hand-in hand with over-thinking.

#5 Over-thinking as a control strategy.  Perfectionists, or anyone else who dislikes making mistakes, often rationalize the use of over-thinking as a way to avoid errors.   While a person might hope to avoid being wrong or making a mistake, over-thinking in order to control people or outcomes is virtually impossible.

Of course, just about everyone I know suffers from one or more of these qualities now and then.  In fact, according research by Susan Noen-Hoeksema, PhD., women are particularly likely to be over-thinkers and are prone to turn to overeating or alcohol to numb the condition.  Depression is a common result for many women trapped in a loop of over-thinking.

The computer age also makes the situation even worse.  Now we can shop for items all over the world 24/7, compare notes with people we will never meet, get in-put from friends and foes without recourse, and our options are nearly unlimited in thousands of categories.  Dr. Barry Schwartz has even written a book about it named, .   In his book, Schwartz explains that we all need to feel we have choices in a situation, but those choices can increase and become so numerous that we become overloaded with choices.  Once overload occurs, we actually become less happy, more frustrated and can even become debilitated. Just like with no choice, too many choices carry negative consequences.

So what can we do?  What is the cure for over-thinking?  Here are several steps that experts recommend:

#1 Take Action.  If you have been obsessing over one choice or decision for days and feel stuck, then maybe it’s time to force yourself into action.  Even if you aren’t quite ready to decide, at least get active by exercising, cleaning the house, taking a walk or pursuing a hobby.  If you are a writer and feel stuck—then sit yourself down and begin writing just about anything to get going.  Once we move past a point of inertia, we frequently can take it in any direction we choose.

#2 Distract Yourself.  When our minds are locked into the rut of over-thinking, we can often break its hold by distracting ourselves.  Going to a movie, singing along with music, or doing any project you love will likely wake you from the spell.

#3 Bring yourself back to your purpose.  One of the best things about having a clear purpose in life is that you can use it to bring yourself back to yourself whenever necessary.  Like says in her book “Following Your Own North Star,”  “Once you’ve figured out what brings you genuine joy, it goes without saying that you should immediately begin filling your life with as much of it as possible.”

“You can spend minutes, hours, days, weeks, or even months over-analyzing a situation; trying to put the pieces together, justifying what could’ve, would’ve happened… or you can just leave the pieces on the floor and move the fuck on.” ~Tupac Shakur