Stress Relief Meditation

“The trick: to recognize that our vantage point is only one of many partial truths and to appreciate the different perspectives from which others see the world.” – Brian Johnson “It’s really important that you learn to shift perspectives. That alone is going to help tremendously in your life. Just imagine the next time you get into an argument with your partner or spouse, and you are able to let go of your view and open up to the possibility that there might just be another perspective on the situation—her view, or his view. The moment you do that, it sets you free.” – Dennis Genpo Merzel Two reasons I love to travel are getting to meet inspiring people and the ability to experience different points of view. They both came together a few weeks ago when my wife and I started a communal dinner by asking the people around us to share something they’re grateful for. (Depending on the company, it can be a great way to begin a meal in a positive way. Plus, people tend to open up afterward,inspiring meaningful conversations.) After we had gotten things started, a woman across the table spoke. She was near the end of a multi-week trip with her two sisters, an adventure that included intimate, hands-on interactions with gorillas in Rwanda and orphaned elephants in Kenya. “I’m grateful for a shift in perspective,” she said, as the rest of the table nodded in agreement. Experiencing a shift in perspective doesn’t require traveling to a foreign land – it’s a powerful strategy that can be used throughout our lives. When faced with an obstacle, or challenging situation, it’s easy to get stuck in a limiting point-of-view. By forcing ourselves to approach the situation from a different angle, we often get a more complete picture, and can find a better way to move forward. It’s like the story of the blind men and the elephant. Six Blind Men and An Elephant A famous parable, adopted by many religious traditions, tells the story of a group of blind men who touch an elephant to learnwhat it’s like. Each man feels a different part of the animal, and then describes what they believe the elephant to be: The first man feels a leg – and says the elephant is like a pillar. The second man feels the tail – and says the elephant is like a rope. The third man feels the trunk – and says the elephant is like a tree branch. The fourth man feels the ear – and says the elephant is like a hard fan. The fifth man feels the belly – and says the elephant is like a wall. The sixth man feels a tusk – and says the elephant is like a spear. Each man has a different perspective, depending on what part of the elephant they are feeling. It’s not that any of their analogies are wrong. In fact, one version of the parable ends with a king explaining to the men: “All of you are right. The reason every one of you is telling it differently is because each one of you touched the different part of the elephant. So, actually the elephant has all the features you mentioned.” Unlike the king in theparable, it’s not often that an outside observer will tell us when we are getting an incomplete view of the situation. Fortunately, a is something we can give ourselves, with the help of some useful questions. They’ve all come in handy for me at one time or another, and I’ve found that asking them is a simple but powerful way to overcome difficulties. Ten Powerful Perspective-Shifting Questions The next time you are in a funk, faced with a difficult situation, or being challenged by another person, try asking yourself one of the following questions – and being open to the answers that arise. What would this scenario look like from a bird’s-eye view? Sometimes it can be hard to see things from another person’s point of view. Rather than try to see a situation as someone else is seeing it, imagine that you are a bird overhead (or a fly on the wall). What does the situation look like from this impartial, ? What assumptions am I holding that would alter the situation if they turn out notto be completely true? For example, say you’re stopped at a red light in a hilly area when a car rear-ends you. Furious at the other driver’s lack of attention, you get out of your car and walk to theirs to find that the only person in the car is a giggling baby strapped into a car-seat in the back. How would your response change after letting go of the false assumption that a driver’s mistake led to the accident? Is there an alternative explanation that would describe what is happening? For example, say your boss is short with you when you complete a project you’ve been working on. You tell a co-worker that your boss doesn’t like you, but then your co-worker lets you know that your boss’s spouse was just in a car accident and is in the hospital. You realize that your boss isn’t upset with you, just stressed by a family emergency. How would my favorite superhero respond to this challenge? Think completely outside the box. Who is your favorite superhero, and if you had their powers,what would you do? Often, we have more power in a situation than we realize, and thinking about different ways to respond can trigger a new idea. What about this situation will I laugh about five years from now? This is a great suggestion from Tony Robbins. Almost all of us have been in situations that we look back on and laugh about. Rather than struggling and being upset in the present, what if we tried to find something funny about the situation, and laugh now – rather than in five years? What’s the best part about this situation? Practicing is incredibly powerful exercise. Is there something about the challenge that you can be grateful for? Maybe you can be grateful that a person or situation is giving you the chance to practice patience. Or maybe you can be grateful that the thunderstorm during your planned picnic provided you with the chance to get cozy and watch a movie. “How am I that?” Often, the behaviors that most upset us are things that we do ourselves that we aren’t proudof. Next time someone else’s actions are causing you to have a negative reaction, follow the suggestion of philosopher Brian Johnson and author Debbie Ford, and ask yourself, “How am I that?” If I could have acted differently leading up to this situation, what would I change? The goal isn’t to focus on why the situation could have been better, but instead to acknowledge past behaviors and learn from them so that future behaviors can be improved. Also, by recognizing our own part in creating a challenging situation, we can approach it with more sympathy and desire to make things better. What opportunity exists as a result of this situation that didn’t exist before? This question is best explained by one of my favorite Helen Keller quotes: “When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us.” “Now what needs to be done?” Accepting that everything about your situation is exactly as itcurrently is, what action can you take right now to make the future outcome the best it can be. Don’t focus on what got you here, or how things could be different, heed the advice of author David Reynolds advice and ask, “Now what needs to be done?” And then – do it! Not every question will apply to every situation, or always spark an immediate revelation. But just like the blind men who are sure of their own truths, seeing things from an alternate point of view can create a completely different picture of reality. Think back to the last time you were in a challenging situation. Would asking one of the above questions have changed your behavior? Do you have any other perspective-shifting tricks that you use to overcome obstacles? Let us know about them in comments below! Many different versions of this parable exist. See for more information [] Jain Stories. JainWorld.com []